PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I just gift wrapped bread.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
That reminds me...we need to get swords
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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