Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
