Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
