that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
