ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
PANTIES FOUND
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