Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
You're so nebulous sometimes
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Randomize
