Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
All I want is dick and wine.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
