Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
