Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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