he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
