so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
