After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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