Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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