ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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