roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
