who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
