i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize