I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
