Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
