Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
