I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I need a burrito and a hug.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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