I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Randomize