i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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