You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
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