what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
