dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize