Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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