do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
