I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize