just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
