Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
