dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
