Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
