I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize