This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize
