my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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