At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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