Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
