Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize