well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
