Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
