I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
