There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
