Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize