The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
