Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize