this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
