i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
