So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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