But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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