how can u be prego again
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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