why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
